Several village idiots have risen from the deepest depths of immaturity to deliver their unprofessional commentary on movies. If you want to feel drunk without taking a sip of alcohol this is the podcast for you.
Episodes
Monday Feb 11, 2019
Monday Feb 11, 2019
In week 3 of the extended Arnold movie month the boys actually watched a movie they all enjoyed for the first time in a while in 1990’s Total Recall.
Max thought the main villains name was Copenhagen, and was not corrected until the end of episode, so enjoy that. Also the boys cover heavy hitting questions like, what is Arnold packing…you know what I mean. Is he doing an above average job of acting in this, or is this one of his worse acting jobs in a great film? Is Sharon Stone cocaine skinny, or workout skinny? Who wore women’s clothing better, Gary Busey, or Arnie?
Also, the gang talks about the ultra violent and multiple WTF visual moments that make this movie both awesome, and extremely weird….like what is up with Kuato or as Preble will describe him, “A malignant Yoda” That scene just comes out of left field.
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Wednesday Feb 06, 2019
Wednesday Feb 06, 2019
For our second movie in the extended Arnold month, The Dicks in the Back Row watched the forgotten 1987 futuristic death match head scratcher: The Hunger Games…wait no….The Running Man!
This is truly a one-of-a-kind movie starring two future governors, a hall of fame NFL running back/ civil rights activist, a rock and roll hall-of-famer, and the former host of Family Feud.
The boys are getting straight to business in this episode; there certainly isn’t any wasted airtime, such as the Tennessee Vols basketball team, the 1970’s TV show Columbo, Josh Beckett, John Olerud, or Google searching wrestler names, or movies that feature boats - just hard hitting commentary!
There is plenty to be discussed: How did the government get the footage of Arnold not following direct orders? Why is Jim Brown in this movie? What is up with Richard Dawson’s assistant in this? And speaking of Richard Dawson, he is so good in this movie…that’s not a question, just saying.
This movie is loaded with puns, and the boys are loaded on something else, so sit down, or stand up, or run away because the Dicks in the Back Row are coming for ya!
If you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com
Tuesday Jan 29, 2019
Tuesday Jan 29, 2019
The gang is starting Arnold month early with the super violent and steroid infused 80’s classic: Commando!
This is the movie that really started it all for "The Arnold" we all know and love today, and the boys have a lot of questions including, but not limited to: what's with the overall look of Bennett, and why would a movie with Arnold have his main enemy be a flabby, fat Freddy Mercury cosplayer? Why did they cast Dan Hedaya as a South American dictator, and what is up with his accent? How did Arnold and Cindy really find the island, and why does the bad guy's house have multiple boiler rooms?!
There's plenty to be discussed: Hawaiian music, Cream magazine, Helen Keller, a poorly attempted Australian accent, and a cameo by Patriots owner Robert Kraft, so strap on your rocket launcher, and do some extra pushups because it’s about to get real sweaty with The Dicks in the Back Row!
Thursday Jan 24, 2019
Thursday Jan 24, 2019
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Monday Jan 14, 2019
Monday Jan 14, 2019
Now on to part 2 of the clip show that was too action packed to fit into one special episode, the boys will be back next week with their first movie of the new year.
0:50-7:57 Halloween
8:00-24:18 Halloween III
24:21- 33:26 Hocus Pocus
33:30- 44:08 Under Siege
44:14-45:07 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
45:10-53:30. Rocky IV
53:34- 57:37 Batman and Robin
57:39-1:03:34 Die Hard
1:03:38-1:10:23 Rudolph
1:10:27-1:15:53 Home Alone
1:15:55-1:20:17 Jingle all the Way
Please rate and review on iTunes, and if you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com…or don’t…see if we care
Tuesday Jan 08, 2019
Tuesday Jan 08, 2019
The boys are still hungover from New Years, so instead enjoy some Dick clips recapping some of our more irrelevant banter from our first year.
1:02-12:28- Jurassic Park
12:34-20:54- Jurassic Park II
20:59-27:15- Footloose
27:20-30:54- Dirty Dancing
30:57-37:35- Road House
37:38-40:26- Red Dawn
40:30-42:51- Ghost
42:54-52:18- Child’s Play
52:24-53:20- Bride of Chucky
Please rate and review, and if you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com…please..please write in..we are so lonely.
Sunday Dec 23, 2018
Sunday Dec 23, 2018
In our last Christmas movie of the month, the gang covered the Arnold movie that no one revisits: Jingle all the Way.
There’s a reason why no one watches this movie…
Few things to cover: Is Arnold the Mattress King of Minneapolis? Can Arnold or Max pronounce Minneapolis correctly? How dumb is Arnold’s family; does his son not know what D-0-L-L means, and why doesn’t the son or Rita Wilson not recognize Arnold at the end of the movie? He is only wearing a visor! Also, how much prison time is Sinbad going to face at the end of this movie? Speaking of prison time, Phil Hartman’s character was way ahead of the #metoo movement in this.
Bunch of dumb stuff in this episode, so make sure you already have your Turboman in hand before it sells out!
Please rate and review, and if you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com!
Tuesday Dec 18, 2018
Tuesday Dec 18, 2018
In week 3 of our Christmas movie month, the gang cuddled up next to a cozy fire, and watched every families favorite Christmas movie about child neglect in Home Alone!
Preble keeps up with the tradition of having his computer explode on him, but you will hardly notice with everyone screaming over each, other and asking important questions like: Why does everyone hate Kevin so much? If old man Marley knew that he was scaring Kevin why wouldn’t he just say hello? How does Kevin not know how to pack a suitcase, but can easily set up an intricate rope pulling system to go along with various booby traps? And while we are on that topic, why does this family have so many mannequins?
All these questions will be answered to go along with Marv’s high pitch screaming on a new episode of The Dicks in the Back Row!
So get your junior mints, BB gun, and VHS copy of Angles with Filthy Faces ready you filthy animal!
Please rate and review, and if you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com!
Monday Dec 10, 2018
Monday Dec 10, 2018
In week 2 of our Christmas movie month, the boys ruin the Christmas special that you grew up loving: Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.
You may have read a few liberal Facebook and blog posts about this famous TV special recently, but if you have listened to this show before, you will not be surprised to hear that the gang going way over the top and covering things ranging from homophobia, the Holocaust, the 1964 Civil Rights Act, and self-mutilation; t’s everything you ever wanted in a Christmas episode!
The guys also ask: Why does Santa rule a serfdom/fascist state from his super-villain castle, and why does he have an eating disorder in a children’s cartoon? Why do all the singing voices sound completely different? Does being a dentist mean something different in the North Pole? And what happened to Donner after Rudolph takes over as the lead reindeer?
All this and more in a brand new, yellow-snow covered episode of the Dicks in the Back Row!
If you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com!
Wednesday Dec 05, 2018
Wednesday Dec 05, 2018
The boys are opening up their presents early with the first Christmas movie of the month: 1988’s DIE HAARRDD….and yes, this is a Christmas movie. Don’t you worry; the boys will explain why.
Lots to discuss in this episode including: What kind of company holds a Christmas Party on Christmas Eve? What was better the McClain Christmas note on Tony or Hans reading it out loud? Who hired the police emergency line staff? Why didn’t anyone hear all the gunfire on top of the building, and are tables bullet proof? The answer is no.
Lots more are discussed including family matters and extremely inappropriate Urkle commentary, Mcclain’s obsession with a particular female body part, and Snickers bars, so come to the coast and share a few laughs with the Dicks in the Back Row.
If you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag…do it…WE DARE YOU at TDbackrow@gmail.com
Wednesday Nov 28, 2018
Wednesday Nov 28, 2018
We wrap up our “Episode of Thanks” month with the movie that destroyed the Batman franchise in: Batman and Robin from 1997.
Boy what a stinker this thing was, and the boys have a lot to cover, including….just the first 10 minutes of this movie in general…and...there's...there's just so much garbage happing that we can’t even get into it here, but we will in the episode, don't you worry about that, so how bout you just download the ep and hear it for yourself.
If you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag…do it…WE DARE YOU at TDbackrow@gmail.com!
Tuesday Nov 20, 2018
Tuesday Nov 20, 2018
On this week’s “Episode of Thanks” Mr. Preble selected the most 80’s of all 80’s movies: 1985’s Rocky IV.
Derek wasn’t able to make it in, but that’s okay because the rest of the guys make up for his loss with enough offensive Italian and brain damage jokes that you would think he was actually there.
Also, Tim forgets to press record for the first 5 mins of the show, so brace yourself for a Episode 1: Jurassic Park flashback.
There are lots of flashbacks and montages in this bad boy; it features 50% new footage, including: who is Rocky more attracted to, Apollo or Adrian? Why is Paulie still hanging around? Is this entire movie really a coma-based dream of the brain-dead Rocky? And that robot…why is there a robot?
If you want to be part of the show . follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/, or you can write into our mailbag…do it…WE DARE YOU at TDbackrow@gmail.com!
Thursday Nov 15, 2018
Thursday Nov 15, 2018
On this week’s episode, the boys climb into the dirty Dinkins NYC sewers in 1990’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
The boys can’t comprehend a platonic friendship between April and the turtles, so of course they are going to push it a bit too far.
They also do talk about the movie, including: why does Shredder have a ninja gang that only consists of white teenagers, and if they are so organized why are they only doing petty theft?
Is Casey Jones a Central Park serial killer? Also, he never changes his sweatpants, so how bad must he smell? And who cares about this farm, except for that super aggressive neck massage that Casey gives April…yikes
All this, and more will be covered, so make sure your pizza delivery driver is on time for a new episode of The Dicks in the Back Row!
If you want to be part of the show follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/ or you can write into our mailbag…do I DARE YOU at TDbackrow@gmail.com
Tuesday Nov 06, 2018
Tuesday Nov 06, 2018
On this week’s episode, we are going back to stupid town with 1992’s Under Siege staring Russia’s BFF Steven Seagal, Tommy Lee Jones, and America’s sweetheart, Gary Busey.
Whoohh boy - there’s a lot to cover in this episode including, but not limited to: Where did these henchmen learn how to shoot? How did the playmate not hear or notice all these people getting shot? And speaking of this playmate, how many women were #metoo’d by Seagal in the casting of this movie? Also, the last hour of this movie makes no sense, so no reason to add anything here … besides the girly running of Steven Seagal. Be sure to take a look at our social media pages for a visual of that gem!
Also, we finally get a deeper look into the mind of Derek and his unconventional note taking, which ties into the bigger madness that is Gary Busey..make sure you tune into minutes 55:44-58:55.
If you want to be part of the show follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/ or better yet, write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com
Sunday Oct 28, 2018
Sunday Oct 28, 2018
For our final Halloween movie of the month, the boys take a drive to Salem, Mass for the 25th anniversary of Hocus Pocus. Don’t worry, ladies; this episode isn’t half as offensive as Dirty Dancing; the Red Sox fatigue is evident in this one.
Some of the heavy hitting questions include: Is Max actually a serial killer? Is his little sister, Dani, a virgin, and if so, what eight-year-old talks like she does? Maybe she learned it from the #metoo bus driver? Why are the kids so casual with this talking cat, and while we’re at it, YOU HAD ONE JOB BINX!
Also, where are all the Massholes and tourists in this town, and why aren’t there any basic B’s spilling mimosas all over themselves? Are all these white people transplants from Long Island? Does every adult aged 25-50 leave their kids at home on Halloween to get hammered?
That and more, so turn on your vacuums and smell the children with The Dicks in the Back Row.
If you want to be part of the show follow us on social media on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/tdbackrow.pod/, Instagram athttps://www.instagram.com/tdbackrow_pod/ or better yet, write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com
Sunday Oct 21, 2018
Sunday Oct 21, 2018
In week 4 of our Halloween movie month the boys decided to stay super relevant with the 2018 Halloween hype and discuss the only movie in the 11 film franchise that doesn’t involve Michael Myers, 1982’s Halloween III: Season of the Witch.
There’s no need to watch this movie ahead of time because the boys did, and they still have no idea of what really happened.
So join in on their confusion, and scratch your head along with the guys as they ask: How can “The largest Halloween mask company in the world” only sell 3 masks? Why are woman attracted to Dr Dan? Is Dr Dan so drunk that he thinks he is also a detective? Does Ellie have a thing against the Irish? Where is Michael Myers?
Also stay around for the biggest plot-hole in this entire movie…hint it has to do with time zones.
We’ve got plenty to cover, including the Get a Job Killer’s spreadsheet of neat facts, so make sure you have your Silver Shamrock masks on for the special giveaway at the end of the episode!
If you want to be part of the show write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com
Tuesday Oct 16, 2018
Tuesday Oct 16, 2018
Just in time for the new Halloween film release, the boys venture to 1978 to visit Hattonfield, Illinois to answer questions like:
How many people live in this town? Why doesn’t anyone notice this stolen car with a masked man driving all over town and hanging around the school all day?
The boys even have some smart things to say, abiet briefly, about the psychological and primitive motives of Michael Myers, but they quickly revert back to acting like children by making fun of fat people at buffets.
There is plenty of Halloween to go around, so grab your pop corn and hold on tight to an all new n' spooky Dicks in the Back Row!
If you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media on our Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter at TDback_Pod, or better yet, write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail
BOO!!
Monday Oct 08, 2018
Monday Oct 08, 2018
In week 2 of Halloween month, the insightful one of the show, Mike Preble, was not able to make it in, so instead, you will be subjected to the bumbling, almost incoherent ramblings of 3 idiots trying to talk about the dumbest movie they have done thus far: The Bride of Chucky.
Cringe along with Max, Derek, and Tim as they uncomfortably try to understand Alexis Arquett’s character, Max’s inability to correctly say pentagram or Jennifer Tilly, and Paco chase to break the all time high BAC level for the podcast.
If you want to be part of the show…totally understand if you don’t after listening to this one; follow us on instagram at TDback_Pod, or better yet, write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail
Monday Oct 01, 2018
Monday Oct 01, 2018
Now with 10% new audio! We had some technical difficulties but late is better than neve, so if you already downloaded this prior to 10/3 feel free to redownload.
The boys kick off a month and mouthful of Halloween favorites with the first Chucky film, 1988’s Childs Play.
Tim is all about Chris Sarandon’s sweater, and we are all about this movie including, but not limited to: Andy’s poor job of making breakfast, the genius who named the Chucky dolls “Good Guys,” and the looming mystery: how many tide pods did Andy and all of the Chicago police officers eat? Most importantly, why doesn’t Chucky stop, drop, and roll?
After the fellas wrap up the movie, they go into the second act of limited trivia, and followed by the question: “what kind of doll would you want to transfer your soul into if you were dying?” Needless to say, this one gets real raunchy, and it is well worth sticking around for.
If you want to be part of the show, follow us on social media at TDbackrow_Pod, or better yet, write into our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com!
Wednesday Sep 26, 2018
Wednesday Sep 26, 2018
And so....the end is near....as we face... the final movie in Swayze September with 1990’s Ghost. In this episode the boys are talking all about Ghost and only Ghost, because this podcast is all about staying on topic, no talkin’ Sox, the Red Sox bullpen, Kevin Bacon, the 1990 New York Yankees bullpen, Mayor Dinkins, or the Catholic Church scandals in this podcast….just the movie Ghost and nothing else.
With that in mind we do cover some heavy hitting questions such as: the interesting faces everyone in this movie makes to express shock, anger, or surprise. How could Demi Moore and Swayze be doing all this pottery stuff, then have completely clean hands? Why does Woppi need to add that the killer is Puerto Rican? What kind of bank allows a stranger who is talking to themselves withdraw 4 million dollars?
Also in this episode, Preble does his deep dive into the philosophical question of what it means to be a ghost but still have desires and cravings for things in your past life…Only to be promptly followed up with the guys making ghost sound effects.
It’s all the info you didn’t ask for! So make sure you are still alive for this new episode of The Dicks in the Back Row!
Monday Sep 17, 2018
Monday Sep 17, 2018
Tuesday Sep 11, 2018
Tuesday Sep 11, 2018
In week 2 of our Swayze September the boys head to Jasper Missouri and get rowdy with Dalton, the Double Duce, and Sam Elliot’s hair in ROAD HOUSE. This episode is Mantown USA, no girls allowed, and they will not stop yelling about this movie until Preble’s microphone explodes. A few topics that they cover include:
How is this bar in business, and how are people driving home after a night of heavy drinking with massive head trauma? Are all the people of Jasper actually babies in adult bodies? Why doesn’t any outside law enforcement do anything about the monster truck driving extortionist that is Wesley? Who is renovating this bar? Where does this dramatic music come from in the last 1/3 of the movie?
Also, Derek has a headcount of the amount of beer bottles thrown in the first fight scene, we cover some of the best bad one liners, plenty of puns by Max, that rocky sex scene, and most importantly...the throat ripping scene.
Feel free to follow us on Instagram at TDbackrow_pod and contact our mailbag at TDbackrow@gmail.com
Tuesday Sep 04, 2018
Tuesday Sep 04, 2018
We kick off Swayze September with the 1987 classic Dirty Dancing. The guys don't have a whole lot of criticism with this one, but pro choice and pro life supporters may think differently...YIKES!
Friday Aug 31, 2018
Friday Aug 31, 2018
Ole Timmy Slim Jim and Mr Preble actually have a life and were unable to make it in, so instead you will be subjected to Max and Derek revisiting 1999's Thong Song in our first mini episode. Some extra content that you didn't ask for, but Max and Derek did it anyways.
Tuesday Aug 28, 2018
Tuesday Aug 28, 2018
This week we move away from man-eating dinosaurs and discuss something even more dangerous ...teenage dancing!
The guys cover a lot of heavy hitting questions like why can Kevin Bacon jump 50 feet in the air? Is Ariel going to pass out from starvation, and speaking of Ariel, why does anyone like her? How can a town ban music but be fine with kids drinking and driving? Also, why didn’t anyone get upset about that tractor flipping over? Who does a recap montage 25 minutes into a movie, and what kind of high school bullies boy’s about not making the gymnastics team? How did Kevin Bacon not kill that kid that he air kicked in the head? Will Tim survive the entire episode? Lastly, how much glitter was used in that last dance scene and how is it not sticking to the floor?
This show has a little bit of everything for the family including Gary Busey’s tapping feet, the catholic church cover up, 9/11, and our continuous conversation regarding Schindler’s List! So make sure you have stretched out those hamstrings because you are going to be dancing like it’s 1984 with The Dicks in the Back Row!
Friday Aug 24, 2018
Friday Aug 24, 2018
In our second episode we venture back to Costa Rica to run circles around the unnecessary, and ill-advised 2001 stinker that is Jurassic Park 3. The guys have plenty of things to discuss including the ghost of Sam Neil's career, how this movie movie would have been better if Rick Moranis was in it, the continuing conversation of Schindler's List with dinosaurs, and how women really feel about tennis instructors.
Also, did the fog eat the entire boat crew, and was this movie originally a crossover with The Mist? Why didn't Dr Grant look up William H Macy's company? Is Tea Leoni intentionally trying to get everyone killed? Are the dinosaurs claymation? And how can everyone be content with a man-eating pterodactyl flying next to them?
We hope all 10 of our listeners are ready to sit with The Dicks in the Back Row!
Tuesday Aug 14, 2018
Tuesday Aug 14, 2018
Welcome to “The Dicks in the Back Row” a podcast where we trash the good movies, and absolutely destroy the bad ones. In the first episode we talk about the 1993 classic Jurassic Park, and we discuss everything you would ever need to know! Including Schindler's list of favorite dinosaurs, Pokémon, can dinosaurs tiptoe, and how would Mark Wahlberg feel about having an Asian as the lead scientist?
Also, why did Hammond hire a team of experts that only included one person with Dinosaur knowledge? What would the yelp review be for Chief Alejandro’s restaurant? Why doesn’t Muldoon take his own advice about Raptors hunting in packs? Would Ian Malcom be named in the #metoo list?
How many times should Timmy had died in this movie? How can Lex navigate a high tech computer system, but can’t turn off a flashlight? And most importantly, how did that Trex get inside the building at the end of the movie, and where was he hiding? All these questions will be answered and more!